Coupons as Scams

I used to be an avid coupon user, especially after we had our third child. With 5 people on a single income in one of the most expensive cost of living areas in the whole country, I had to think creatively and work diligently to maintain control over our family’s outflow. I even had a binder with the baseball card clear plastic slot sheets to organize my coupons. I was a bit self-conscious when I walked in the grocery stores armed with this big binder, but it got to a point that other people’s looks didn’t bother me anymore. I had a lot of time and it was almost like a game to compete with myself to see how much I could save.

What a difference a few years have made! Now, I almost don’t use coupons at all.

I have grown to suspect that coupons are just another marketing trick to get us to buy more than we need. The manufacturer coupons especially, come from large name brands that are much more expensive than store brands. Even with these coupons, sometimes these name brand products still have higher prices than the alternatives. Do I really need to try that newest and greatest lip stick while I still have a dozen half-used ones at home? Using a coupon to purchase still means I have to spend money in the first place.

The other problem of coupons is the time you spend, not just in clipping, but finding the specific item listed on the coupon. Some stores have the one you’re looking, others don’t. I spent countless minutes to hunt for one thing in an area of the store that I don’t normally frequent, only to be disappointed that the item was either not there, or not exactly the one on the coupon.

Oh one last thing, all coupons have expiration dates. Who can keep track of all that?

Rock-bottom priced stores such as Aldi and Lidl have come into my community, further released me from the coupon clipping obsession. The store brands at these stores are so reasonable, and their staple offerings are of such good quality, I no longer have to chase after brand name products just to save a few cents.

These days, I only use store coupons, and that is scarce.

COVID-19 Changes…Not Many

Many have said that COVID-19 will change us all forever. The life we knew is gone because of this deadly virus.

To that I respond, as a cheap person, the arrival of COVID-19 pandemic has not changed our lives much.

We never go out to eat much. Our trip to any restaurant, sit-down or drive-through, averages about 1-2 times a week. We used to eat out even less than that. I allow the frequency to increase only after I started to feel more secure with our financial situation, especially seeing that our retirement is in a better place than most.

We cook at home most meals anyway. For a family of five, with moderately to slightly picky eaters, sometimes it is just easier to make food at home to accommodate what everyone wants that day. Plus, it is healthier because we don’t overeat or exceed our sodium or fat intake. Even when we have friends over for dinner, I cook the meal at home. I’m not that great of a cook, but I am resourceful and I can find half-prepared food from grocery stores to supplement my thin portfolio of recipes.

We don’t shop for clothes, shoes, or other discretionary goods very often. We don’t just go to the mall to “hang out”. Going to stores less means less opportunity to be tempted to spend money.

Movies and theaters are special treats here. We simply can’t afford to drop $60 every couple of weeks for the five of us to go see one movie at the movie theater. Our kids know that I am cheap so they don’t even ask for popcorn and drinks anymore. Instead, we have Netflix and Amazon Prime. I do still buy a DVD or digital download once or twice a year, if I know that we will watch that movie over and over.

We choose free parks for recreation. Orienteering is a great mostly free and family-friendly sport for us to get out and get fresh air, in addition to exploring nearby parks in a different way. I’m looking forward to being able to do that again.

As a whole, this pandemic has not changed this cheapskate’s life too much. My hope is that as other families slowly get used to a more austere lifestyle, they may find that it is not so bad to have a simpler and cheaper way of spending your money and time.

 

Now it is a good time to think Optional

What is optional in our lives? Since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic, so many things that once seemed essential to us have become optional. Getting up on time is optional, changing out of PJ’s is optional, brushing your teeth is optional, 3 meals a day is optional, heck, even surviving until tomorrow is optional these days. What do we really need to survive?

WiFi, I say, that is NOT optional! But if we do lose that too, I’m sure we’d find a way to continue on.

This is not the zombie apocalypse, not yet. We still have a lot of normalcy. Utilities are running, mails and packages are being delivered, trash trucks still are coming and going. Grocery stores and gas stations are all open. I am grateful for all these people working out there to provide this normalcy and to allow us to stay home. Their jobs are not optional.

COVID-19 and the Gift of Time

Wow I was productive back in 2013! I’m back y’all. Now my kids are older and more self-sufficient, I’m slowly recovering from many, many years of sleep deprivation. Now COVID-19, or Coronavirus, has shut countries after countries down from normal life, we have a new normal. We have no set schedule to adhere to. No places that we have to be. And no patience left for homeschooling, 🙂 So I thought, why not go back to blogging? I can write in social distancing.

Stay tuned, stay safe, and most importantly, stay healthy!

The Quarter Difference

A new Aldi grocery store opened its door in my area a few months ago. Immediately I became a regular, it doesn’t hurt that a small ethnic store is close by so I can hit both grocery stores in one visit, cherry-picking the best they have to offer.

A friend of mine went to visit this Aldi for the first time last week. She was there but didn’t go in. Why? Because she didn’t have the quarter for the shopping carts, and she couldn’t be bothered to go inside to ask for a quarter from the register. So she left without even taking a look at all the wonderful and inexpensive products Aldi has to offer.

I had to chuckle at her Facebook post. How many of us don’t want even a slight inconvenience to save money because we’re too entitled to our comforts? Everything has to be handed on a silver plate to us. We get mad when our shopping carts don’t line up neatly away by a minimal wage worker. We groan when we have to bring our own bags to carry our own groceries. We complain when we have to stuff our own bags. Are our highly civilized fingers too elite to do a bit of physical labor for the sake of saving us a bit of our own money?

This is just another example of people can’t be bothered to save money. I’m always amazed at people who go to 7-11 or any convenience store at a gas station to buy anything other than gas or mechanic services. Only a short ride away is the grocery store, where you’ll find the same things for 30% less. Better yet, do you really need that droopy donut or that tasteless cup of coffee?

I may be just a tab too OCD about saving money, yet I’ve given away quarters to shoppers standing in front of Aldi digging for coins. Aldi is a great chain with many admirable qualities. I’m tired of clipping coupons for a dollar here and there. Aldi doesn’t take coupons but its everyday low price is really just that, low and lower every week. Lower prices and same quality as name brands, what’s not to love?

Granted, it’s smaller than most grocery stores, but I’ve come to love that character too. It means I’ll spend less time shopping. Plus, every week Aldi has special items. I just love the thrill hunting for bargains among its center isle. The $1.69 bulbs I planted? They came out in force.

For a family of five, we’re grateful to have an alternative than Trader Joes that offers us familiar comforts from unfamiliar brands. They’re owned by the same German company, but I just can’t never find anything we like to eat at Trader Joes.  For a shopper like me who shops at ethnic stores all the time anyway, Aldi helps me pick up the American staples, such as milk, eggs, and snacks.

At this day and age of diversity, some of my friends are not ready to change from their old ways. I was like them five years ago. That’s before our three children started growing like weeds. That’s before we have to start paying for all the ridiculously expensive extra-curriculum activities. That’s before I made saving money my other full time job.

 

Kids Sport is not for the Cheap of Heart

You may not want your kid to be a professional athlete or in the Olympics. But she says she’s interested in soccer. So you sign her up for a local club. She does reasonably well and seems to be having fun. Just when you Start to dream about college scholarships, her coach approaches you to talk travel soccer. That’s when you really start to see $$$ signs instead of muscles.

There’s club fees and uniforms. Competition fees and coach fees. Then there’s the travel expenses. A ten year old can’t travel to any place on her own. At least one adult will have to go along. Plus you feel guilty if you don’t attend the events to cheer your child on. God forbid if you miss his big moment in the arena! All the hours you drive to and from practice, all the cold, dreary days you sit through a game, are not enough to earn you the parent of the year award.

In an area like Northern Virginia, the options of sports you can take your child to are truly endless. Gymnastics, ice skating, soccer, volleyball, martial arts, fencing, horseback riding, hockey, so on and so forth. All of them cost a ton of money to participate. You add it all up, that’s a private school tuition. The higher your child advances, the bigger time commitment it requires, the emptier your bank account becomes.

Thousands of dollars for what? A chance of the ever elusive college scholarship? You may be better off saving the money you’re spending on sports to a 529 plan. Then your child will not need a scholarship to go to a decent college because he’s armed with a big fat savings plan.

Why do so many of us do it then? Maybe to make our kids happy. Maybe we like the exercise they’re getting. Maybe we feel the pressure from everyone else. If our children are not in some sports, music lessons, and/or scouts, if their free time is not jam packed with all kinds of activities, we feel like we’re failing as parents. Or maybe we just like to outsource parenting, like we outsource so many aspects of home life – house
cleaning, lawn mowing, etc..

There is a price for everything. If you’re cheap at heart like me, it may be easier to resist this madness called raising children faster. I’ve tried many sports with my kids. Frantically I was trying to discover their hidden athletic abilities, while neither of their parents are great athletes. We don’t even watch sports at home since we don’t have cable tv.

One of the biggest lies being told to our kids is that you can do anything you set your mind to. Really? Can a five foot tall person play in NBA? Not really.

Thousands of dollars later, we picked up bike riding as a form of exercise everyone seems to enjoy right now. Something we can do together as a family that costs very little in comparison to organized sports. The kids won’t get a trophy from riding their bikes, and eventually they will find it lame and boring. But I always think back to my teenage years, walking to school on the hill every day because I have no other choice. It made my legs very strong. The effect of it lasts many decades. For those of us who have not an ounce of hope of ever becoming a professional athlete, there’s plenty of cheap sports we can take on.

Subscribe Your Life, One App At a Time

The online business community has finally found its Holy Grail. Something that keeps on giving, something that forces consumers to keep on paying. It is called: subscription, or membership.

It started as an Online Gaming scheme, now it’s everywhere. Online newspaper, online TV, even Microsoft Office now offers a subscription to this popular product. Instead of buying and owning the software out right, it wants the customer to pay for a yearly fee to use the program. Granted on the surface it’s going to be cheaper than the traditional option, but in the end individual consumers will be renting the product by default. Renting, in the long run, is almost always more expensive than buying. All those Rent-A-Vac places are just like payday loan quick cash joints. They’re sharks preying on people who wanted things they can’t afford and don’t have the will to resist the temptation. Amazon is now following Costco’s model. The free shipping threshold is getting higher and higher, some lower prices on products are not available unless you’re its Prime member.

Two of my favorite games (I’m risking revealing my age here), Diablo and Star Craft, have produced new versions completely based on online game play. The games themselves still cost just as much, $50 a piece, then you have to play it online if you want to play with other human players, which was the most entertaining part of the original games. And then you spend real money to purchase the more advanced gears. That is why I haven’t played these old favorites of mine, when I used to stay up all night long dueling it out with friends.  I am so disgusted by Blizzard’s shameless money grabbing that I vow not to buy another product from them again.

The latest business that took on the subscription is somewhat unexpected. It is doctors. I was searching for a primary physician and came across this doctor in our neighborhood that requires his patients to sign up to see him for a monthly fee. Being a member, depending on how much you’re willing to pay monthly, will get your doctor to communicate with you by email, schedule appointments online, and get reminders by phone or email, etc. With this doctor, it is not optional. He asks all of his potential patients to sign up to become a member before he even sees them. Somehow I feel very strange about this. Not only that the membership doesn’t give you anything particularly valuable besides some fancy bullshit, I feel it’s way too commercial, way too much about the money, which is, at least traditionally, not a doctor’s about. Maybe I’m too naïve to think that doctors and hospitals are there primarily to make people well and help people out. I get it, they have to make a living as well. But when people go to see a doctor, they’re already willing to pay for the service. It’s not like doctors need much more money than they’re already making. Morally, it just feels wrong.

If you don’t care about morality or money, at least you should get tired of setting up another account and remembering another password! Of course, all this will be online stored somewhere else in a server that could be broken into. Has anyone forgotten about the Ashley Madison fiasco? Our identity is already out there, readily available for people to take advantage of. The fewer footprints you leave on the Internet, the less opportunity of an identity theft.

Maybe I am too old-fashioned about this. From a money saving standpoint, I think it makes sense to rent if you only use it very infrequently. But stuff like Microsoft Office, I use it everyday. And I don’t mind using the older version. Now I really start to sound like a grumpy old man.

Oh Sit Down Middle-Class

Warning: this is a very long, boring, and in my opinion, not very insightful article in the Atlantic: The Secret Shame of Middle-Class Americans.

No, it’s not entirely sexual. So read on, even if you’re goofing off in your office, or have little eyes reading over your shoulder.

I never heard of the magazine until someone shared this article on her Facebook. I never heard of this writer either. I’m just a first generation immigrant, blissfully ignorant of most of the English literature world. But I do consider myself one of the Middle-Class Americans. And as you’ve probably figured out from my previous posts, I’m a bit of a voyeuristic money lover.

So I read on.

And on. And on.

I don’t know about you, if an article on the Internet requires me to tap Pg Down a dozen times, my eyes and my brain risk losing their concentration. I kept reading because I was trying to find the punch line. The climax!

It never came. Americans are living paycheck to paycheck? Check. Easy credits started it? Check. Stagnant wages? Check. Life’s unforeseeable circumstances? Check. For average couples, climax has been reached long before I finish reading this piece.

OK OK, the guy did touch on financial ignorance, which I think is the root of the problem, but he never hammered on it. No solution to how to help Middle-class more financially secured or even educated. Maybe he was too proud of his daughters’ accomplishments to admit he’s only passing his lack of financial knowledge on to them. He never taught them it’s better to say no to some things in life, like a wedding that requires your parents emptying out their 401k plan, than to have to make the decision whether or not to pull the plug when your parents are dying in the hospital because you can’t afford to keep them alive.

Get your kids to pay for their own wedding. If they’re old enough to get married, they’re old enough to pay their own way. Better yet, teach them that the wedding day is nowhere near as important as the rest of the marital life. Save your money now so you can actually have a better marriage because you won’t be fighting about money when you have enough money.  Fight about money is the No. 1. reason for divorce. But this is going to be a part of an article I will write about all these silly American “traditions”. Where has a country with less than 300 years of history got all these traditions anyway?

Back to the article. Like I said, concentration. I don’t want to criticize the guy (too much). He’s owned up to his own decisions, even though he counted all the “outside” factors. But I wouldn’t write a blog if I don’t get to be judgemental. Man I love to be judgemental. There’s nothing wrong choosing a profession that is inherently unstable and not highly profitable. But it’s unwise to expect the same life style as

In the end, our choices are ours, so should the consequences. I chose to have children, I chose to quit my money making job. The consequence is that we have no cable TV, no latest electronic gadgets, no brand new cars, no paid newspaper or Internet subscriptions. My husband puts 12% of his paycheck into his retirement plan. We’ve lived on that net income for as long as we’ve been married, 10+ years. Whatever money I made went straight into our savings, so not only we always have an emergency fund, but we got used to live on a single income long before we became a single income household. No my husband is not a writer, he actually makes close to the annual median income in our area, one of the richest places in the U.S. His wage didn’t stay stagnant because he chose to move around every few years. The only thing that has stayed constant is that percentage he puts into retirement.

Has there been emergencies in our life? I’d say our third child is the biggest surprise. Because of him, we had to upgrade to a bigger car, had to pay for private preschool a few more years, and I had to stay home longer. The kid also eats like a monster. So our food bill is rising. With the exception of the food from the list above, I guess we don’t need a bigger car or preschool. I could’ve still gone back to work like I planned to when the first two children entered elementary schools. But then again, we’re not really hurting that much financially. We make adjustments and sacrifices. I work more diligently to save more. I change stores I go to. We stop hosting large parties in our house. The last one is mostly because I’m just too exhausted to entertain.

Middle-class Americans, don’t be ashamed. Nobody is born with financial knowledge. Talk to your spouse and your children, sit down and look at how and where you spend money, talk to a financial advisor, get Dave Ramsey’s books (free from the library), make a plan. If a naturalized American like me could learn, you can too.

 

Back from the Lazy

Yes I was in a cloud of laziness for the past few days, or months, maybe years, I don’t know. Facebook is evil people. It allows perverts like me too much access to other people’s lives. So much so that I started freaking out when I secretly scroll down my “friends” Facebook walls. Am I wasting my life people watching on Facebook? Do I really know these people? Do they really know me? Do I really care?

Well I know the answers to these questions. So I’m back. Writing. About Money.

I don’t worship money. I don’t think a person’s worth is determined by how much he has. But I like money. It gives me a sense of security. It gives me an opportunity for independence, to provide for my loved ones, to be generous.

The best gift I can give to my kids is not college fund, or pay for their weddings, or a house down payment. It is a financially secure retirement.

So how does a stay-home-mom living in one of the most expensive areas in the U.S. do it?  I’m trying.

 

11/16/2013 Shopping Log, Or the First Anti-Shopping Log

Buy turkey right now. But if you’re like me, not going to cook turkey in my house, then there is no spectacular sale in the grocery stores right now.

I haven’t written my weekly shopping log for a while. Now the biggest shopping season of the year is upon us. Yes I have participated in the Black Friday madness.  I’ve done the getting up at the crack of dawn so I could witness the madness first hand thing. And you know what? It wasn’t as thrilling as it sounds. All I got was some cheap DVDs and board games, and lots, lots of disappointment. The door busters were never there. The stores were trashed within 30 minutes they opened. I found out the prices were not even that great compared to the after Christmas clearance sales.

Material desire is the biggest enemy of a frugal life style. I guess I need to nip it in the bud. I need to stop treating shopping as an entertainment. Especially we’re going on an expensive vacation next year. We need to save up. So instead of shopping, I’m going to write about how not to buy stuff.

Because to me stuff is never as important as having a new experience.